Simply having children does not make mothers...

I'm kinda screwed in the mother department.

Always have been really, 2 moms and they are both kinda shitty.

Ones tryna get it together but it's hard to make up for years of shitty mommyness :/

I've always felt a missing place in my life as far as mothers go, I've never had anyone to do the things that Moms do with their daughters. I'm actually still kind of unsure of what that is exactly. I may never understand but I know that when I see my friends conduct these long convos with their Moms on the phone I become a tad envious. I'm curious as to what that is like. I want to know how it feels to go to brunch & get my toes done with my Mom.

Ive noticed that I fall in love with some of my friends mothers because they are so great in my eyes. They do things that I've never experienced but have always longed for. It's like "wow..your just like the moms on TV!" Most people don't understand me when it comes to this topic because having the mom around is pretty typical for most situations especially in black communities.

I get told all the time "well you have ur daddy, most people don't have their daddy"

Your right, and just how they have an empty space, I do too. Respect my empty space.

I refuse to let this space remain empty though. Even if it means I have to have 20 of my own children to make up for what I missed in a mother.

To be honest, I've always figured my last chance at a good "mother figure" would be in my husbands Mom.

So I pray that whoever she is, she likes me, and accepts me as her own. :)

Thats one of my life wishes.